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Nervous and looking for positive moving stories. Pretty please!

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 8:40am
12 replies511 views6 members subscribed
wlally07

Posts: 4

3 helpful points

Location: Casares

Joined: 15 Mar 2022

Hi All

Sorry in advance, if you have seen hundreds of posts like mine.

I and my wife really want to sell up and move to Spain, specifically the Costa Del Sol, with our child, but I’m always putting myself off, due to nerves.  - What will happen? Will we like It? Will I get a Job? Will we meet new friends? Which area is best for families? Probably the usual stuff, that everyone goes through.

I’m sure if we move, everything will be fine, we will have more family time and a better standard of living.

It would be great to hear any of your stories, hopefully, positive that may help to calm my nerves.

Thanks in advance

Wes


pricklyone

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 10:11am

pricklyone

Helpful member

Posts: 176

130 helpful points

Location: Torrox

Joined: 10 Nov 2018

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 10:11am

Hi there.

These are all very valid questions, and most of us asked ourselves at least some of them before making the move. You'd think, therefore, it'd be easy to answer but I'm afraid it isn't. There are so many factors - some that only you are aware of - it's just not possible to give concrete assurances. However, I guess most of us on here would agree to a few points that almost everyone has in common.

1) Rent first. Places that seem great on paper, or during a holiday, don't always translate into great places to actually live. Spending 2 weeks in August in that lovely rural house with a pool is very different from living there in January. The lively, vibrant area you stay in every time you are here can be a nightmare when you have to get up for work/school and the noise hasn't died down till 4am. They might be obvious examples, there's so much more to consider depending on your family and how you want to live.

2) Do your homework on working in Spain. It's much more complicated now we have left the EU. Tax, NI, pensions are all very different here. Also, don't forget that the working age Spanish work very long hours - some of the longest in the EU - which they do to provide for their children and elders. They expect that, when they retire, the next in line will do the same for them. Family time is as tight here as it is in the UK. 

3) Make contact with people already living here. There's a good Facebook group called After Brexit In Spain, who have a wealth of information about all aspects of living/owning property/working here, and the membership is from all over the country. It may be that you realise you need to consider widening your search area based on what folk who live & work & use schools have to say. The Citizen's Advice Bureau in Spain CAB Spain (citizensadvice.org.es) is also very good. Getting first hand advice is invaluable, and if you connect with people whose family structure and lifestyles reflect your own it'll be even more helpful.

If you do your homework and come over here prepared and informed, there's no reason why you can't have the life you are dreaming of. We all had challenges in our moves, we all overcame them and found a life that suits us. I will wager there's nobody on this forum who hasn't had to change some expectations and/or put a lot more effort into something than we wanted. But, I'll also wager that very few of us regret making the move and have no intention of going back on it. Start a folder, either on your PC or in an old fashioned folder, and begin to organise your information. Come over at different times of year (winter can be harsh in some places). Keep an open mind about where you live. Living in Spain is great and I'm sure you will get everything in place to move here. Spain's not going away, if you take time to plan your move I'm sure you and your family won't regret living here.

wlally07

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 11:10am

wlally07

Original Poster

Posts: 4

3 helpful points

Location: Casares

Joined: 15 Mar 2022

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 11:10am

pricklyone wrote on Thu Mar 17, 2022 10:11am:

Hi there.

These are all very valid questions, and most of us asked ourselves at least some of them before making the move. You'd think, therefore, it'd be easy to answer but I'm afraid it isn't. There are so many factors - some that only you are aware of - it's just not possible to give concrete assurances...

.... However, I guess most of us on here would agree to a few points that almost everyone has in common.

1) Rent first. Places that seem great on paper, or during a holiday, don't always translate into great places to actually live. Spending 2 weeks in August in that lovely rural house with a pool is very different from living there in January. The lively, vibrant area you stay in every time you are here can be a nightmare when you have to get up for work/school and the noise hasn't died down till 4am. They might be obvious examples, there's so much more to consider depending on your family and how you want to live.

2) Do your homework on working in Spain. It's much more complicated now we have left the EU. Tax, NI, pensions are all very different here. Also, don't forget that the working age Spanish work very long hours - some of the longest in the EU - which they do to provide for their children and elders. They expect that, when they retire, the next in line will do the same for them. Family time is as tight here as it is in the UK. 

3) Make contact with people already living here. There's a good Facebook group called After Brexit In Spain, who have a wealth of information about all aspects of living/owning property/working here, and the membership is from all over the country. It may be that you realise you need to consider widening your search area based on what folk who live & work & use schools have to say. The Citizen's Advice Bureau in Spain CAB Spain (citizensadvice.org.es) is also very good. Getting first hand advice is invaluable, and if you connect with people whose family structure and lifestyles reflect your own it'll be even more helpful.

If you do your homework and come over here prepared and informed, there's no reason why you can't have the life you are dreaming of. We all had challenges in our moves, we all overcame them and found a life that suits us. I will wager there's nobody on this forum who hasn't had to change some expectations and/or put a lot more effort into something than we wanted. But, I'll also wager that very few of us regret making the move and have no intention of going back on it. Start a folder, either on your PC or in an old fashioned folder, and begin to organise your information. Come over at different times of year (winter can be harsh in some places). Keep an open mind about where you live. Living in Spain is great and I'm sure you will get everything in place to move here. Spain's not going away, if you take time to plan your move I'm sure you and your family won't regret living here.

Hi

Thanks for responding and for all the information, it's very much appreciated. 

I have requested to join the Facebook page you advised on and I'll have a good look at the citizen's advice page.

If you don't mind me asking, how long have you been living in Spain?  Are you working/retired? - What did you find most difficult?

Many thanks

Wes

pricklyone

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 12:31pm

pricklyone

Helpful member

Posts: 176

130 helpful points

Location: Torrox

Joined: 10 Nov 2018

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 12:31pm

wlally07 wrote on Thu Mar 17, 2022 11:10am:

Hi

Thanks for responding and for all the information, it's very much appreciated. 

I have requested to join the Facebook page you advised on and I'll have a good look at the citizen's advice page.

If you don't mind me asking, how long have you been living in Spain?  Are you working/retired? - What did you find most difficult?

Many thanks

Wes

Thank you!

I've lived in Spain on and off for 30 years, have worked here in the past (self employed) and am now retired.

The hardest things varied, depending where I was in life. When my children were little, making friends was easy as school gates are school gates around the world! Spanish life with children is much better than UK life with children, BTW, and the schools are very good - tho much more disciplined than UK ones in my experience. Where I am in my life now, making friends is more effort and I tend to miss out on what younger folk are doing. It's just different.

The paperwork and regulations, especially post-Brexit, are a pain, Spain is much more bureaucratic than the UK. But, Spaniards moan about that, too. That's why it's important to get to know as much as possible before you get here, tho it's still a pain...

You really do need to familiarise yourself with the language as soon as possible, just get to grips with basic everyday words. Even if you have a degree in Spanish, it's very different using it on the streets, as it were. Nothing heavy, just build your confidence. I have come to terms with the fact that every day brings challenges with the language, even tho I speak if reasonably well by now. It's a journey, as they say!

Spain is not a quiet country. This may sound minor but, some people really struggle with it on an everyday basis. What may be charming on holiday can become seriously irritating and intrusive if noise bothers you. I'm not making light of this, it's been enough to make some folk move house or even leave the country! You can't live in Spain and not get noise, even in the middle of nowhere.

Don't hesitate to PM me if you think I can be of help. Good luck in getting your dream in place!

wlally07

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 1:12pm

wlally07

Original Poster

Posts: 4

3 helpful points

Location: Casares

Joined: 15 Mar 2022

Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2022 1:12pm

pricklyone wrote on Thu Mar 17, 2022 12:31pm:

Thank you!

I've lived in Spain on and off for 30 years, have worked here in the past (self employed) and am now retired.

The hardest things varied, depending where I was in life. When my children were little, making friends was easy as school gates are school gates around the world! Spanish life with children is much better than UK life with children, BTW, and the schools are very good - tho much more disciplined than UK ones in my experience. Where I am in my life now, making friends is more effort and I tend to miss out on what younger folk are doing. It's just different.

The paperwork and regulations, especially post-Brexit, are a pain, Spain is much more bureaucratic than the UK. But, Spaniards moan about that, too. That's why it's important to get to know as much as possible before you get here, tho it's still a pain...

You really do need to familiarise yourself with the language as soon as possible, just get to grips with basic everyday words. Even if you have a degree in Spanish, it's very different using it on the streets, as it were. Nothing heavy, just build your confidence. I have come to terms with the fact that every day brings challenges with the language, even tho I speak if reasonably well by now. It's a journey, as they say!

Spain is not a quiet country. This may sound minor but, some people really struggle with it on an everyday basis. What may be charming on holiday can become seriously irritating and intrusive if noise bothers you. I'm not making light of this, it's been enough to make some folk move house or even leave the country! You can't live in Spain and not get noise, even in the middle of nowhere.

Don't hesitate to PM me if you think I can be of help. Good luck in getting your dream in place!

Thanks and I will do :) 

Gesther

Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2022 6:19pm

Posts: 87

20 helpful points

Location: Estepona

Joined: 18 Apr 2020

Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2022 6:19pm

Just rent for a year . Then decide 

HP63

Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2022 10:12am

Posts: 50

6 helpful points

Location: Antequera

Joined: 6 Sep 2019

Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2022 10:12am

Unemployment is fairly high here in Spain.  If you are a digital nomad, this will not affect you, and you will find the lifestyle more relaxed,  the weather to be slightly better...not at the moment... ja ja ja.

If you do not speak Spanish,  rent on the Costa for a while. Inland properties are cheaper to rent and buy..I live in a stunningly beautiful area...but a good command of Spanish is essential.

Be aware that the bureaucracy is a nightmare..and do not even consider moving to Spain without sufficient savings.

tonizufelt

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 1:59pm

Posts: 21

Joined: 19 Jul 2020

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 1:59pm

I can tell you from experience, it's all about you and how you handle change.

My husband and I sold everything and came to the Costa del Sol with only suitcases, specifically the Marbella area, 2 and a half years ago without knowing anyone and fell truly in love with the area and the people.

You can worry and fret and be frightened and will find it to be terrible. We came with the attitude of wanting something new, wanting an experience, looking for the joy and excitement that comes with something or someplace new and were rewarded with exactly what we expected. Yes, the Spanish system of doing things is different and sometimes frustrating and annoying as hell but the experience of being here FAR outweighs that.

So, I say come if you want to experience new sights, new languages, new food and new people, come! If you're "playing chicken" with the move, don't come. No one wants to be faced with a negative attitude.

You asked, I told you! 

HP63

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 2:22pm

Posts: 50

6 helpful points

Location: Antequera

Joined: 6 Sep 2019

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 2:22pm

tonizufelt wrote on Thu Mar 24, 2022 1:59pm:

I can tell you from experience, it's all about you and how you handle change.

My husband and I sold everything and came to the Costa del Sol with only suitcases, specifically the Marbella area, 2 and a half years ago without knowing anyone and fell truly in love with the area and the people.

You can worry and fret and be frightened and will find it to be terrible. We came with the attitude of wanting something new, wanting an experience, looking for the joy and excitement that comes with something or someplace new and were rewarded with exactly what we expected. Yes, the Spanish system of doing things is different and sometimes frustrating and annoying as hell but the experience of being here FAR outweighs that.

So, I say come if you want to experience new sights, new languages, new food and new people, come! If you're "playing chicken" with the move, don't come. No one wants to be faced with a negative attitude.

You asked, I told you! 

You both came to the near environs of Marbella as retirees with two American retiree pensions  It's important to explain to those people who are wishing to relocate for work, about the actual facts of doing such.

tonizufelt

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 2:51pm

Posts: 21

Joined: 19 Jul 2020

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2022 2:51pm

HP63 wrote on Thu Mar 24, 2022 2:22pm:

You both came to the near environs of Marbella as retirees with two American retiree pensions  It's important to explain to those people who are wishing to relocate for work, about the actual facts of doing such.

Yes we did. But we came without any knowledge of living here, what it was like, how and where we would live and what it would be like it exactly what it will be like for them, and a positive attitude. 

Yes there is the added issues of finding a job,, the language, the rules and laws of living here are another thing. They should find out the laws for working, the laws for living here, what they need to do to become residents, the length of time it takes to become a resident, The Medical programs, the schools, the ease or difficulty of living here and what schools are the best, etc. We came as retirees but already knew what it would take to become residents. We had no idea of the systems and how difficult it is to work thru them. And they're coming with an already doubting mind. It will be even more difficult with the wrong or tentative attitude before they get here.

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