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Geetting answers to posts x

Posted: Wed Jun 9, 2021 11:10pm
5 replies62 views3 members subscribed
jane1141

Posts: 6

Location: Tolox

Joined: 3 May 2021

H x I find it a shame that quite a few people are asking questions for advice of people living in Tolox and getting no answers. 

It doesn't help when looking to move there 😢

I'd just love to know, will I make English speaking friends whilst I'm learning some Spanish. 

I'd love to be convinced that  My Husband and I won't be lonely????? 😊😘

Thank you xx

Andrew14

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 4:48am

Posts: 76

32 helpful points

Location: Vélez-Málaga

Joined: 26 Mar 2019

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 4:48am

Hello Jane

Sorry, don’t know Tolox at all, but suggest that to find out if it will suit you, you really need to spend time there

Maybe rent somewhere for a month or more, or if that not possible due to work, as much time as you are able to, before committing to buy.

pricklyone

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 11:02am

pricklyone

Helpful member

Posts: 143

92 helpful points

Location: Torrox

Joined: 10 Nov 2018

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 11:02am

It's a shame you feel like that. The truth is, unless there's something specific asked about a place (is there a medical centre, a school, a bus service) it's not possible to answer a question about the quality of life somewhere. It's a very personal thing. I've known people move out here, having visited a few times and with a basic level of Spanish and enough money to live comfortably, and return within 6 months because they've been miserable and homesick. I've known very happy, long term couples split up after moving here. Some of us moved into a place having never been there before, with no knowledge or friends and now can't imagine living anywhere else ever again. Some people move to a favourite holiday place, somewhere they've come to year after year, only to find it's very different actually living there all the time.
You just don't know. It's a risk, for everyone. There's no Right or Wrong answer. We don't know what you like/don't like, how easy you find it to learn a language, how your relationship works, what your extended family is like etc etc etc etc.

People don't respond because they don't Not Care. They don't respond because there's no answer. As Andrew14 says, you just to come over and find out for yourself what works for you.

jane1141

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 1:37pm

jane1141

Original Poster

Posts: 6

Location: Tolox

Joined: 3 May 2021

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 1:37pm

pricklyone wrote on Thu Jun 10, 2021 11:02am:

It's a shame you feel like that. The truth is, unless there's something specific asked about a place (is there a medical centre, a school, a bus service) it's not possible to answer a question about the quality of life somewhere. It's a very personal thing. I've known people move out here, having...

... visited a few times and with a basic level of Spanish and enough money to live comfortably, and return within 6 months because they've been miserable and homesick. I've known very happy, long term couples split up after moving here. Some of us moved into a place having never been there before, with no knowledge or friends and now can't imagine living anywhere else ever again. Some people move to a favourite holiday place, somewhere they've come to year after year, only to find it's very different actually living there all the time.
You just don't know. It's a risk, for everyone. There's no Right or Wrong answer. We don't know what you like/don't like, how easy you find it to learn a language, how your relationship works, what your extended family is like etc etc etc etc.

People don't respond because they don't Not Care. They don't respond because there's no answer. As Andrew14 says, you just to come over and find out for yourself what works for you.

Thank you for responding. My Husband and I were in Tolox overnight seeing a house, which we want to buy but when we spent Saturday night in town at the top square it was very quiet and we met every one was lovely, just nobody spoke English and this worries us. We jave have been told it is a great community of mixed countries and we didnt see that in our short time there. We are very socialble people amd want to be involved in the community. Also didn't find many shops of any kind. I want to buy local and put into the community. I'm going to speak to Karen who loves living in Tolox village and hopefully She'll set me right. Thank you so much 😁💕Jane and Stuart 

pricklyone

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 4:30pm

pricklyone

Helpful member

Posts: 143

92 helpful points

Location: Torrox

Joined: 10 Nov 2018

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2021 4:30pm

jane1141 wrote on Thu Jun 10, 2021 1:37pm:

Thank you for responding. My Husband and I were in Tolox overnight seeing a house, which we want to buy but when we spent Saturday night in town at the top square it was very quiet and we met every one was lovely, just nobody spoke English and this worries us. We jave have been told it is a great...

... community of mixed countries and we didnt see that in our short time there. We are very socialble people amd want to be involved in the community. Also didn't find many shops of any kind. I want to buy local and put into the community. I'm going to speak to Karen who loves living in Tolox village and hopefully She'll set me right. Thank you so much 😁💕Jane and Stuart 

These villages in Axarquia are not like the typical 'ex-pat' places, in that they tend not to have big, tight knit communities of foreigners that only stick to themselves, shop in places that only do 'their' food, and never mix with other communities, or Spaniards. We tend to come out of the woodwork slowly! After a while, you'll find each other. Where I live there's lots of mixing between different nationalities for everything from fiestas to petanque, nights out to language classes. That's why renting is a good option at first, it gives you a chance to see what's there and if it fits. Even a month long holiday will show you a whole different side than a couple of nights.
As for the language, you just have to bite the bullet and Do It. Make mistakes, make a fool of yourself, ask, laugh, learn as you go along. Being timid won't work. The Spanish are not offended if you get it wrong, they like helping you out. In time you'll find who can help you with official stuff, which is always useful, even if your Spanish gets good. Start now, in the UK, with online classes, there's good YouTube videos that just teach you the basics of conversation, then when you get here, use what you've learned! You just have to brazen it out, and you'll make friends in the process - even if it's the lady in the bread shop at first, it's a start to being accepted into the wider community. If you are intent on getting into life here, you'll get it right one way or another.

jane1141

Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2021 1:24pm

jane1141

Original Poster

Posts: 6

Location: Tolox

Joined: 3 May 2021

Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2021 1:24pm

Thank you for responding x I do not ever want to have the "gangs" of expats who don't mix, that's so ignorant, how rude!!! 

I have cognitive problems and have extreme memory issues and I worry I won't retain enough of what I'm already  trying to learn, just phrases and simpld questions. It bothers me that I may vo into town and not find someone who speaks english for me to have a gab with. I hope that doesn't come over as cheeky. I am trying my best and would, but it's a big worry. 

I think I need an inbetween, not expats but more English speaking people. Thanks for ur advice x

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